Five Reason Why I Despise Being a Clean Freak

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Five Reason Why I Despise Being a Clean Freak 

I think it all started when my dad used to wake my sis and me up on the weekends, shouting, “Man the brooms”! He was no doubt a clean freak too. I think I was around nine or ten years old when my connection to cleaning began. My sister and I would quickly jump out of bed in terror, and get started on our cleaning frenzy. And to think, it’s at least, two cups of coffee before I attempt to hold a decent conversation.  

Trust me, we weren’t happy about it – but we did it nonetheless. We dusted, vacuumed, cleaned the bathrooms, and any other choirs my dad had set into action that day. Reflecting back on those days, I think he wanted to give my mom a break, and figured, hey, this is what “girls” are supposed to be doing – cleaning, cooking, and behaving as we were told.

My mom always kept a very clean house, and my dad was just as obsessed with cleanliness as she was. I can’t say for sure whether it’s a learned behavior, but we were surely trained from the cradle.  Oh, and my sis is exactly the same way – she has her own cleaning-cross to bear. With that being said, here are the top ten reason why I hate being a clean-freak, and why I feel today I’m damaged goods.

Be sure to check out my post called 19 Of My Favorite Cleaning Products. I’m sure you will discover some awesome cleaning products and get to read about how and why I use them! 

Wasted Time – While I’m cleaning, all I can think about is, “I could be out shopping or reading, or playing on the PC, or listening to music. These thoughts are constantly cycling around my head like a dust storm. I start to calculate and ask myself, “Exactly how many hours have I spent cleaning?” It’s impossible to total – so I move on. I would have to say this feeling is my most despised. And what about the cleaning in between the cleaning? You know the “touch-up” cleaning. Spray some Windex here, Swiffer some dust there. Wasting time is for the young – not for my middle-aged rear-end.

Groundhog Day – I know we all do a lot of things that are repetitive in our day-to-day lives, but seriously? It’s the same rooms, the same chemicals, the same pent-up rage inside me. I stare at the bathroom and think, “for the love of God – can’t people just clean-up after themselves?” Sure, it is great exercise – the most cardio I will ever get within a week, but at least if I’m at the gym, I can be miserable comparing myself to every hot young thing working out right?

The Cost – A few years ago, I decided to pare down my use of chemicals. For a while, I used more than eight different cleaning products thinking the more I purchased, the easier it would be to clean. Well, it worked the opposite. Can you imagine the yearly cost? Again, too much thinking involved, but according to the Statistic Brain website – we can spend on an average $42 a month on cleaning products. I figured I could have doubled that. Think of all the shoe shopping you can be doing instead? The meals out I could have enjoyed – instead, the stakeholders at SC Johnson are enjoying them.

Dual-Edged Sword – I think people’s perceptions of me vary on this subject. I feel they are either thinking, Wow, I wish I could be that clean, Wow, this woman has some major malfunction, cleaning the way she does. I know for a fact that I annoy people with my cleaning obsession. Just today,

I had the cable guy stop over for a repair. He rang the bell, I opened the door, and said, Hi, do you have any booties, please? There was about a second between the words hi and do you have any booties, please. I apologized quickly to him, but he huffed away rather annoyed to gather his booties. Mostly, I annoy myself which is so sad when you think about it. I even annoy my sister, and remember? She’s a clean freak too!

Guilt – It overcomes me – Yes, there are days when I don’t feel well and can’t clean the way I normally do. Usually, I lie in bed, sick and nasty, and think crap, I guess I can dust downstairs tomorrow, or, I know I feel like crap, but I bet I can use the portable vacuum upstairs. How can I feel guilty when I don’t clean?

Well, it’s easy. Inside my obsessed brain, there is a person wondering how badly the dust on her furniture is, or how much soap scum is on the bathroom counter-top. The good news – when all is clean and sparkling, all the guilt washes away, and I’m once again that good little girl who has indeed manned the brooms.

I ask myself, “Is there hope for me? – Can I change my obsessed ways?” The answer is clear and loud – no, my dear…

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